I'D JOIN THIS SWAP IF . . . . . . . .

I'd join this swap if it were not hosted by me!

I'd join this swap if it weren't international--the higher postage rates are killing me!

I'd join this swap if only more people would have joined before me!

I'd join this swap if it wasn't an electronic swap!

I'd join this swap if I could think of one sarcastic comment that kgeslab could do to make this swap better!

I'd join this swap if it wasn't sooo darn expensive !

I'd join if it didn't have requirements that even God couldn't meet.

I'd join this swap if it were about unicorns. I love unicorns and there aren't enough unicorn swaps out there.

and besides, this doesn't have a rating filter so I'm sure the swap mod will let in all kinds of flakers.

i'd join this swap if i could find a package of unicorn helper at the grocery store

Unicorn Friend- How about hosting some UNICORN ATC swaps. I would love to join so I can get my rating back up. My rating was not my fault- my computer was gone so I have caught up, but it takes time to bring one's rating back like it was when a 5. (I had to buy a new computer.) It is not quite my friend yet. MiniQuilt

How about hosting a 'snail mail UNICORN swap?" MQ

i'd join this swap is the mail person wasn't afraid to come to my house

@rosedzi here is your unicorn, but it's going to cost you big time...

I'd join this swap if it wasn't such hard work to complete! :p

I'd join this swap if it didn't require sarcasm. Sarcasm is really hard to find in my town, and I hate to mail order some just for this one swap. What if my partner doesn't like the brand I order?? We've got a lot more irony and self-righteousness around here; can I use that instead??

I'd join this swap if I could be absolutely certain that all my 10 partners will rate me....

Sorry for the off topic there, I mean:

. . . also

I love this swap!!! No standing in line at the post office with the crazy old postal lady looking at me like I've lost my mind! Crazy old woman needs to get some happy mail herself!

I would join if the host would pay my Comcast bill for the month. I can barely pay my bill as it is because the family unicorn is eating us out of house and home. And do you have any idea how hard it is to mind rainbow hay in the city?!

I'd join this swap if only I spoke English!

How about this?

I would join this swap but I am sure I cannot keep track of who I rate or who rates me-sigh! Or if anyone made me laugh-too much input!! My spreadsheet or mind have already failed me a couple of times so can anything or anyone be trusted??? Yikes where is that rating stealing unicorn again?? Hugs to all, maybe, probably, yep seriously!! ;)

I would join this swap, but it doesn't mention in the swap description whether my cat can also join, and we do EVERYTHING together. I would just like you to know, that if you don't allow Mister Fluffy Bumberkins to join this swap, he will be very angry and, like, that's discrimination against cats and stuff. I'm sure that I could Google at least a dozen different court cases where it was proven that Swap Bot hosts have no right to discriminate against cats.

So, to all of my swap partners, please be advised that Mister Fluffy Bumberkins has his own wish pot account, and you MUST send him a gift of at least $15 in value, otherwise we will rate you a 3. This makes perfect sense, because, like, you didn't adhere to the rules that I added to prevent Swap Bot feline discrimination.

OMG 10 Partner!!!!! Do you know how expensive that can get and it is international. What a crock!

I would join though if say there were 9 or 11 partners.

I wish I could get out of this swap, because unicorns are just not my thing, but since I'm the host I'll have to stick it out. Why can't someone else love beavers as much as I do? Maybe if I stay in this swap someone will send me a beaver sticker.

I'd join this swap if it did not require me to think of a suitably sarcastic comment! I don't think thinking should have to be part of a swap. Plus, I'd be much more likely to join if it had 20 partners. 10 partners is for the birds!

I'd join this swap if it wasn't overrun with unicorns. I mean, really. Unicorns? Though they do drop shiny loots. Or is that just the unicorn level? And the rainbows! Can't we have a little less color? My black and green monitor can't handle it.

I'd have joined this swap if someone would post some pics of faeries instead of unicorns. Gothic ones please!

I'd have joined this swap if my pesky sister was not the host. I mean really - BEAVERS? Why would anyone want a beaver sticker......

I'd join this swap if it had more pictures in the description. It's not right that other participants have to add pictures of their own because the host doesn't provide any. My reading skills are not great and it's quite hard to understand what this swap is about. You should consider people with reading problems and make this swap more accessible for everyone by illustrating the description better. If there's just plain text some people will be scared away - also, it is slightly discriminating, so you might want to consider that. So, yeah, I might join if you could cater to special needs.

Also, I'm totally with @arianneroxa in this: As I pointed out, the host seems to discriminate several minorities with this swap. I don't feel it's okay to host such a swap, excluding illiterate people and cat partners. I encourage everyone to drop out, this is really going too far!

I'd join this swap if all the participants weren't a bunch of crybaby whiners. I mean, unicorns? Fairies? We are adults, we should be requesting pictures of coffee and commuting!

Marco.

I'd post some faeries or cats or even a darn unicorn if I only knew how to. My technology skills barely allow me to use swap-bot at all!

Ps - I WILL NOT ANGEL Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins! I will, however, angel any beaver that wants to join the swap!

Polo!

Yay! Unicorns! No beavers though. I dont like beavers.

I'd join this swap if i werent allergic to cats. I can't believe the host is letting cats in.

Also, that Marco comment offended me. I can't join swaps with people like that.

And another thing... I'd join this swap, but I'm concerned about hearts. If i post an extra comment I've doubled what I've aent... But i haven't sent anything extra special. So i probably won't receive hearts from my partners. And my heart-to-swap ratio will decrease, substantially. So I'm screwed. I'd join this swap without the heart drama.

I'd join this swap if someone would go to work for me so I can spend all day thinking of great things to write if I "did" join this swap.

Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins would like to let everyone know that he expects people to leave mice, rather than hearts.

I'd join this swap if the participants are more serious about it! C'mon everyone, Swap is a serious business! No laughing, don't even think about smiling!

Put together the nicest possible package with pristine material (NO recycled stuff!) that is profile specific, nothing from a Dollar store or a discount store. Make sure to put the correct postage on, and mail it out before the deadline! WAY before! As in within 24 hours after the partner gets assigned!! Make sure it doesn't smell like cigarette smoke! Also, I am allergic to lobster and milk! How could I be sure that noone will send me a lobster or milk carton? And how would I know that the partners will get assigned right away? Who will angel?? And whaaaaaat, unrated newbies are allowed??!! Sky is falling!!!!!

Also, I'd join this swap if the sarcastic comment is profile-specific. After all, what is funny to one person may not be funny to someone else!

How do I rate if I get a comment that looks like it was made by someone other than my partner? Is there a rule about swapping recycled comments?

I'd join this swap if the instructions were clearer, I mean really, how am I suppose to figure it out.

10 Partners! Yikes, I'll have to look through all these comments just to find my partners. That will take me days and days.

I agree with @sebastian122 What if someone copies my comments????

And the length of the swap......it's too long.

@kgeslab could make this swap better by sending all participants a winning lotto ticket.

Ooops - I mean.... I Join This Swap If .... @kgeslab would send all participants a winning lotto ticket.

Good thing you changed that slamophile. You came THIS CLOSE to rating a 1, young lady!!

I'd join this swap if it wasn't International. Do you know how much that is going to be in postage? I bet it takes extra power from my computer if I get an International partner. I'd definitely join if you could assure me I wouldn't have to send an e-mail internationally.

Thanks for making me laugh today! I mean it. No really!

Flyingfox - be assured that your lobster and milk carton are in the mail.

Darn - the swap made the top 10! Now I feel the pressure. Do you guys know the kind of pressure the comes with hosting such a time intensive swap? Plus I will have 5 people to angel! rEally!

If you want unicorns and rainbows and stuff try this my little pony swap: http://www.swap-bot.com/swap/show/173301

Still have never seen a beaver swap. Not even a beaver ATC swap. I've seen EVERYTHING as an ATC swap, but no beavers!

PS - can someone tell me how to make live links and post pics? I'm a techno idiot!

I'd join this swap if I had a computer. It's very hard to type ob my phone. Also, can you make sure I'm not partnered with my sister StasiaK? She has a dog and a cat and I'm just SURE there will be hair stuck to anything she sends me. @kgeslab if you can't find what you're looking for on swap bot you should search the internet. Just go to Google and search for "beaver swap".

@kgeslab Make sure to go to Google Images so you can get a good look at other people's art! :) Hope this helps!

Now that works! cats riding unicorns! let's have some beavers riding cats. somehow think this swap is decending into the depths of anarchy.

I'd join this swap, if it weren't just a ratings grab for flakers!

No flakers allowed in my swap - they will be dropped!

@kgeslab Clicky for My Little Pony ATC Swap

To make a live clicky, type in [My Little Pony ATC Swap] (http://www.swap-bot.com/swap/show/173301) without a space between [title] and (link address)

I am still trying to figure out how to insert a pic myself...

And yes, I'd totally join the swap if I could figure out how to post pics!!!

! [] (pic url) that my fellows is how to insert a pic, just delete the spaces and you're good to go!

Like so vvvv

id join this swap if you made me bacon

I would join if this was regional only. You know that any emails you send outside your own state are monitored and sent to the aliens right?

A GIANT BEAVER RIDING A GOOSE HOLDING A MAPLE LEAF!

I'd join this swap if I wasn't scared off by all the posts above me :)

I would join this swap, but I'm afraid I would get my 9 other swap IDs as partners, and I would end up with nothing......but they would all get good ratings.....

Oh good lord...I don't even want to think about what I would find if I Googled "beaver swap"!

@crochetjunkie that beaver is my absolute favourite!

How do I rate if I get a comment that looks like it was made by someone other than my partner? Is there a rule about swapping recycled comments?

Carane aku rating yen aku njaluk komentar sing katon, kaya iki digawe dening wong liya saka Pendhaftaran partner? Apa ana aturan bab ngganteni ulang komentar?

I'd join if the sign-up date were closer. With such a distant date, I know I'm just going to forget all about this swap, so I'd better just not sign up. So there!

I'd join this swap except it hasn't made me crack a smile yet. Get with it guys!

marco

I'd join this swap if you could ... guarantee that I would get a star, that my partner sends me unused stamps in addition to everything on my wishlist, if there were fewer partners, and if you could explain to me why there are postcard size requirements and why a larger one needs more postage even though you didn't tell us that in the description. Why is it my responsibility to figure out my own country's postal requirements for mailing live unicorns without feed?

polo!!!

i would join this swap if i could be guaranteed to get only NAME BRAND kawaii only from japan, and with ALL original packaging! NO hello kitty.

unrelated: i hate all beavers and unicorns and expect ot get ONLY items i HAVE listed on my wants list which is 3 items long and only included my favorite obscure anime.

Well I'd join this swap if it only were intergalactic, what the heck is going on here?!? What kinda show are you running here, first discriminating against cats, then minorities and now even aliens?!? PFFFF, Imma report you is what imma do!

I'd join this swap if only unicorns and beavers could peacefully coexist on our planet!

I'd join this swap if the hostess were much more serious about angelling. I don't own a dog or a cat (or even a unicorn), but I will go buy one of each, so that my package can have plenty of pet fur in it. And I will take up smoking so that my package will smell of cigarettes (is menthol ok?). I promise to spend plenty of time reading profiles first so that I can send you what you are allergic to, especially if it's food, which will all be quite a bit older than the "Best By" date. Also I will send a bottle of warm, 3 year old beer regardless. Sender's choice on brand. But only if all of my recipients live in the USA. If they don't, I will ask to be dropped from this swap after partners have been assigned.

PS: My husband says he likes beavers, but when I asked him if he had any beaver stickers he looked at me funny.

PPS: Three year olds shouldn't have beer.

I'd join this swap if it had fewer partners.

I'd joing this swap if I didn't have to read all these comments and Unikitty trumps all!

I'd join this swap if everyone were as experienced with sarcasm as I. I've been sarcasm-ing for over 20 years now, so I'm an EXPERIENCED sarcasm-er. I just can't stand to join a swap where I've put forth so much awesome sauce with the sarcasm-ness, only to get a half-assed, thrown-together sarcasm in return. Therefore, I will politely decline joining your swap and ask if there are any experienced sarcasm-ers out there who would like to do a private sarcasm swap send me a pm. But before I agree to a private swap, I need to see a sample of your sarcasm to deem it worthy of receiving my sarcasm in return. Thank you.

I'd join this swap if I can stop laughing long enough to keep my hands steady so that I can hit the "Join" button! I am laughing so hard, tears are coming out of my eyes, and cannot even see where the button is!

Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins would like everyone to know that FelineBlue is actually HIS NEIGHBOUR and definitely not just a fake profile that he created "to get more stuff".

I'd join this swap if- omg! Is that a beaver?? I freaking love beavers! I have 4 chihuahuas that feel left out if Fluffy Bumberkins gets to join. How do you tape the edges so sarcasm doesn't fall out??? What if the mailman can't deliver sarcasm?? Did I mention I love beavers? I have one dog with a flat tail and buck teeth. Can he be a beaver? I need to go fold laundry... I'd join this swap if I didn't have ADD.

I'd join this swap if the hostess was giving out cheese sandwiches made with Venusualian Beaver Cheese. It would make it better if I could spell too!

I'd join this swap if I weren't a newbie and knew what i was supposed to do.

Are there beavers in Venezuela? Can your really make cheese from Beaver milk? Hmm. .. I will consider giving everyone who joins a Venezuelan Beaver Cheese Sandwich if the swap hits #1.

With a side of kitty pate' and a unicorn flavored ice cream cone - but it's coming from the United Arab Emirates so it will all be melted by the time it leaves the country.

Now that, my friends, is a big beaver!

I'd join this swap if you ban all underaged swappers. Because you should psychically know that someone is underage even if they lie about it especially if they list Justin Bieber as a like. No one over 17 ever lists him in their likes. I'm sure a Bieb-fan has joined!

And anyone who likes unicorns must also be banned. They are disturbing and have especially nasty strawberry-smelling farts. And I'd join if you banned @crochetjunkie for posting that offensive dude in a sexually promiscuous pose wearing dead unicorn hair. I can't join a swap where unicorns were harmed in the making of photos that are part of fulfilling the swap!

I would join this swap if there were less HUGE pictures in the comment section. How am I suppose to see them? And all the unicorn comments....I liked unicorns too...when I was 12. Except the dude in the sexually promiscuous pose has me intrigued....humm?...oh...lost my train of thought for a minute, where was I? Oh yes, the huge pictures...and Justin Bieber? Yuck!

I would join this swap if it was not in the top 10. I mean really - that is a lot of pressure... and forget the beavers - kgeslab also really loves birds, dogs, cats, snails, fish, ok she would be an animal hoarder if her husband would let her be!

I'd join this swap if the host would ensure that international partners would finish a week or two before the deadline so that I don't have to wait for their swap. I want to move this from "sent" to "archive" as soon as possible. It almost goes without saying that the host must realize that anyone who does not live in my country is an international partner, even if they live in the same country as the host.

Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins would like everyone to know that he is deathly allergic to humans. Please do not send ANYTHING that comes from a house where there are humans, as it could be hugely CATastrophic for his health. Naturally, we would have to rate you with a 1.

I would join this swap but really @kgeslab ..Venezuelan Beaver Cheese???

Also I would join this swap but there needs to be more MS paint edited pics...seriously :P

I'd join this swap if I didn't have to rate anyone afterward!

I would join this swap if I wasn't going to the Caribbean to work on the perfect tan. Yes with this body there will have to be a cabana boy and lots of drinks!

I'd join this swap if it wasn't overrun by all these sarcastic comments and unicorns! How is anyone going to take this seriously?

If join if so many people weren't watching!

I won't join this swap until somebody actually proves they can milk a beaver.

I had a doctor who claimed he milked his cat. He was a funny man. he said the kittens were rejected so he had to milk his cat himself lolol. Funny picture that would be.

I would join this swap if I could cut out my letters from an old book and mail them to you ransom note style.

I'd join this swap if no sarcasm was allowed.

i would join this swap if half you ladies was not playing with your beaver.(pictures).

Jaceslave I'd give you 2 hearts if it were possible and I had you as a partner!

Id join this swap if spring would come!

I might have to delete this swap because I promised everyone a beaver cheese sandwich if the swap made it to #1 and guess what???? It did!!!!!!!!

Really ladies have to post pictures of their beaver? Ugh! What is this world coming to? Anyway, I'd join this swap but I'm scared I might get a illegible coffee stained napkin swap! I mean come on, I'd rather my mailman act like he hates me! I already have the largest mailbox you can legally put up! I don't know if it would all fit! What do I need? A post office next door?

@kgeslab I'd join this swap if I weren't scared my husband would find a new beaver in the mail!

I'd join this swap if there was actually something to do between the sign up deadline and the send by date. I now have no excuse to go to my craft room and hide out from my kids!

This swap series was hosted for 5 rounds by the lovely @Jaichan ♥♥

I would join this swap but it Hit 95 degrees yesterday and it is projected to be 99 this week. This causes chocolate, lip balms, candles and stuff to melt, yes melt in my mail box. I cant take the chance that I will get melted sarcasm. I am sure you wont understand.

I'd join this swap if the word unicorn and beaver weren't mentioned.

What about all the other animals . . . if cats and beavers and unicorns can join, what about platypuses? I'd join this swap if platypuses can join.

i'd join this swap if you all weren't head cases.

i'd also would join if i could send my partners my dust bunnies, which are the size of texas

wow what comments loved reading them I would join this swap if the comments wasn't so long it took me 2 hours to read them all and I really enjoyed it ! Nice down time , now I am behind on my house work oh well there is tomorrow and the day after and oh next week too !!

i'd join this swat if people would quit stealing my comments before i can get them typed in. what a lot of weirdo's

That's not a beaver, that's a platypus. Obviously the host has no idea what she is doing, some people can't even figure out what we're supposed to swap!

i'm dropping out of this swap because there's WAY too many picky people who had the nerve to sign up

I'd join this swap... if all the good excuses weren't allready taken.

; )

I'd join this swap but I'm recovering from being bit by a platypus while chasing a unicorn who I was trying to convince to help me clean out my dust bunnies because Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins refuses to. Plus, the rainbows keep distracting me from my vital work licking envelopes and taping them to walls around town.

I'd join this swap, but I'm just not sure about the sarcasm requirement. I'm kind of new at creating sarcasm, and I'm honestly not sure how my sarcasm compares to others. It's always hard to put your heart and soul into your sarcasm and send it off, only to get something back that totally blows yours away. I really wouldn't want my partners to be disappointed!

I'd join this swap, but I hardly ever actually get rated on my swaps and I hate wasting the time sending things with no results. Also, so far nobody has posted an image of a Mouse. At least I know how to remedy that!

Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins is very interested in being partnered with StarMouse. Very interested, indeed.

/drool

I'd join this swap but I'm scared of getting something hairy in the mail!

I'd join this swap if I got partnered with @Jaichan If that's not happening, I'm not joining.

Marco.

I'd join this swap if there wasn't a platypus chasing me. He's scary!

@arianneroxa please note: I have chicken livers and catnip! I'm not afraid!

I'd join this swap if it hadn't dropped from #1 to #2

I'd join this swap if it were not all about unicorns and fairys and beavers and platypus and mice and rainbows and Bieber and beaver cheese and if I wasn't expected to know how to use a period or comma and it wasn't all about trying to worm hearts out of 10 people at once...I mean com'on really? If you change all the parameters and make it all about zombie kittens I might put it on my watch list

P-p-p-p-p-p-p-platypus

i'd join this swap, but i'm

Polo!

Oh no now we have zombie cats?!?! I am afraid this swap is going a little too far even for me. It will scare away all of my unicorns. beavers and unicorns can coexist but not unicorns and zombie cats!

Besides, I'd join this swap but the voices in my head told me not to.

now if each of the voices were given their own individual swap partner too maybe I could join this swap.

just who in the h3ll is "marco" and his friend "polo"?!?

I would join this swap but Draco is way funnier than most of us.

This IS the most hilarious comment section of ANY swap I've EVER seen!!! Awesome idea @kgeslab with an even better outcome!

I'm thinking of dropping from this swap now because no one commented on my comment and my comment was really awesome. Plus, I'm really upset because my pants are full of the pee because I've been laughing so hard and bah humbug! I hate to enjoy myself.

@seekingjoytoday ...yes, it was an awesome comment...but why do you lick AND tape envelopes all over town...isn't that a waste of saliva??? Thank goodness you weren't bit by a beaver...they have way bigger teeth!!! Maybe if you offer Mr Fluffy Bumberkins a mouse..(or at least, Skittles...you know...taste the rainbow!!) he will help you with the dust bunnies!! Don't drop out now....there's still 20 more days of this hilarity to be had....think of how much fun it will be to find your partners comments to rate them on!!!!

I'd join this swap if the instructions weren't so damn complicated!

I'd join this swap if for sure I wouldn't get a package and I have to contact the person over and over again. Then, when I finally do get the package it must smell of cigarette smoke but put a dyer sheet in there and it would make it all better. Then maybe I'll join your swap. Not a true story.

How do I rate if I get a comment that looks like it was made by someone other than my partner? Is there a rule about swapping recycled comments?

I'd join this swap if there were no animals brought into it. I'm totally allergic to unicorn hair and I'd hate to walk around with red puffy eyes all the time. The only animal I'm not allergic to is beavers and wild birds but when I mention beavers people stare at me in a really weird way. Especially Americans. So I'd join this swap if no Americans were allowed, because they always get all the good swaps! Oh wait . . I am an American!!!!

I'd join this swap if the zombie kittens bit all the beavers and unicorns making a massive army of rabid Beiber hating creatures! And still I'd only join if I could be their queen! I mean have you ever ridden a zombie unicorn into battle!? It's EXHILARATING!

I'd join this swap only if I could be guaranteed to be partnered only with my 10 other swap-bot profiles. I really need more hearts and I think I am awesome.

I'd join this swap if only I could get my lazy butt off the couch and to the post office before it closes.

I'd join this swap but I might not recieve something that I specifically listed on my profile. I ONLY like emails from yahoo addresses. The others are just so low quality. I put so much effort into making quality swaps! Can this be Yahoo only pleaassseeeee!?!? ;)

I'd join this swap if I could figure out how to get all these awesome pics onto my Pinterest board! It's called Beaver Unicorns Unite with Zombie Cats to annihilate Bieber.....making the world a more peaceful place.

I would join this swap if it had something to do with books - I don't get all the animal references and now we are adding cats - I hate cats - and next it will be some ugly insect that we are talking about. Books are a much better subject to talk about.

I'm only going to join this swap if all the people in it will stop whining about things other then the quality of this swap and the partners we will be assigned to.

I would join this swap but seriously after all the time and effort I'll have to put in it...plus postage costs...and all my partners are allowed to do is post a comment. Wow. What a cheesy swap!

Here you go @beaglemom ...

I would join this swap if @SoandSo wasn't signed up. Sorry I can't have a possibility of having her as a partner. Her swaps go way above and beyond and I have to boycott such people. Lol.

I'm only joining this swap if my partner sends me this.

I've joined this swap but am thinking i may need to drop it because the wrangling and exporting of unicorns is outlawed in the continental US. It's okay in Hawaii i think? But i know it isn't ok here. Virginia is so strict and PETAs headquarters is here, too. I know I'll get a citation or worse. I think unicorns are endangered anyway. Plus i don't think beavers should be made fun of.

I would join this swap if there weren't so many comments to read. My time is valuable, you know. I could be sleeping right now but I'm now subjected to reading all these comments. Additionally, I'm highly disturbed by the number of unicorn photos being posted. I find those offensive because

I dont think i can handle a swap that only talks about my beaver , platypuse and pussycats oh my. Then when everyone getting there horns on . On top of that. I dont think i can keep my mind where it needs to be

I'd join this swap if I wasn't having surgery on the 24th of April!

Ug....now this swap is back to #1.....I suppose I'll have to join now. But I'm not sending any unicorns. Do you realize how much that would cost to mail....and 1 to each of my 10 partners? Not to mention the international shipping costs? I may be a MOM, but I'm not Made Of Money!!! This swap is going to be the death of me!

I'd join this swap if we could swap hugs because that shit would be tight..get it.. :D

I'd join this swap but there has been so much talk of unicorns but no leprechauns mentioned. I can't believe such discrimination is allowed. I guess no one cares about the pot of gold that he hides at the end of the rainbow. Oh and by the way....Marco

LMAOOO! ~ Omgosh - You're all nutzoid!! I'm dying of laughter reading all these posts!

I would seriously join this swap if it was only for Nurses, living in the state of California who make ATCs and were currently suffering from "I have WAY To Much Time on My Hands To Answer Your call Light again for the Tenth Time in Four Hours Itis." Also, the nurses would have to be wearing either an adult diaper or must have a Foley catheter in place because there is not time in a typical shift to stop and go pee, let alone to make an ATC! A Starbucks gift card would have to be given for all heart ratings as well as this is the main source of a nurses strength. Lastly, absolutely no doctors with poor handwriting are allowed to write out my evaluation!

I’d join this swap but I hate electronic swaps, you have email or PM people to trade and its so hard to do that and not be late sending. I have joined exactly 1 type 1 swap so far and I know it must have been hard to do because my partner was late so its gotta be hard work to send these kind. Oh and people are right, overseas connections are so spendy bandwidth is gonna be killer. What if I get partners who I have all pissed off and they don’t rate what if I don’t get hearts oh man I love hearts, I live for hearts. Its an awful lot of reading its hell on us old folks boy so many comments to read. Oh we get cheese sandwiches and unicorns? Um I want that cute unicorn @crochetjunkie he looks like fun. Cool I always wanted a beaver cheese sandwich. The cats want a flying unicorn not one of them land-bound unicorns. Think Pegasus with a horn, no not Pegasus with horns that would be a horny Pegasus and this is a family place. What about resend?? how do we do that what if they don’t read my comment the first time… what a pickle. We’re gonna put all the people at the post office outta work they will be so bored won’t be able to read our naked postcards anymore. Not to mention folding all the envies I mark do not bend. We pay extra postage just so they can fold em. ; )

I'd join this swap if it were not always day in America when I am sleeping. I'm sure I'm missing something while I sleep. Also, with regards to leprechauns, what, do you think this is? March or something? A flying unicorn would be good because it would save postage. Finally, does anyone have a recipe for beaver cheese sandwiches they would be willing to send me only if I set up a private swap and send them my 3rd born child? I think I really need to learn to make that beaver cheese sandwich and my third born child is hitting puberty and we all remember what that is like!

@kgeslab I'm willing to swap with you privately but I won't accept your third born until it's gone through puberty. I'd join that private swap if you set it up, made sure you 3rd born is well-behaved and potty-trained and you didn't want a beaver-cheese recipe. Beaver cheese! That's disgusting, seriously! And it's pretty hard to come across weird shit in Germany because Germany is the cleanest and least perverted country in the world, everyone knows that! So, if you'd be willing to swap your 3rd born for some nudes of Mrs Merkel riding a brown bear that's flying toward Putin, we could talk.

I'd join this swap but I am way too busy for this kind of nonsense. We should be doing meaningful swaps that lead to world peace between unicorns and beavers. I don't approve of the way swap bothers are turning a blind eye towards the persecution of unicorns by beavers and such. Everyone must take a stand and use their time more wisely.

swapbotters not bothers…see I'm so bothered by this swap and its disregard for the treatment of unicorns, I couldn't even spell right!

i'd join this swap but its not about cats!

I would join this swap if my partners would leave a comment with their rating and at least consider a heart after I spent 3 dollars more than the swap required and spent hours reading their profile and personalizing their swap according to THEIR profile! And by God at least leave a person some kinda info to work with in their profile!!!

I'd join this swap if it had a facebook page.

I'd join this swap if it had started last month. It's too late now.

I'd want to join this swap if no females were allowed.

I would join this swap if it was more exciting than playing Bingo! Or even if I had a clue how to post a picture on here......any picture would be fine , never mind a damn unicorn or cat.....did someone mention cats??? ......or even if I were taller than my sausage dog....that does mean I can still sign up , right?

Id join this swap if it involved coffee, diamonds and cats ( not in that specific order)

I'd join if you could provide a vegan beaver substitute.

Rats ! I meant to say: vegan beaver milk substitute. oops...

I'd join this swap if I could edit my comments. Can you fix that?

I would join this swap if people were not so fixated on the swap send date - I mean really - do you want me to rush the perfect package? It needs time to get fabulous!

I'd join this swap if my husband could actually make it to the post office for me. He always offers to mail my swaps and then gets them postmarked on the day after the swap was due. I'm so tired of being rated down for the postmarkings that were his fault. Its rude...I'm going to be getting some beaver cheese soon and I'll be making his lunch with it!!!

How do I rate if I get a comment that looks like it was made by someone other than my partner? Is there a rule about swapping recycled comments?

i would join this swap, but all the cool comments are already taken by other weirdos

i'm splitting from this swap because the host hasn't assed the artners yet

I love you all and this made my day..though I really will not join...too much work....obviously

How do I rate if I get a comment that looks like it was made by someone other than my partner? Is there a rule about swapping recycled comments?

Polo

I would join this swap but I am allergic to beavers.

I'd join if you require a certain amount of time and effort be put into people's comments. I don't want to receive any sticker-slapped comments!

How do I rate if I get a comment that looks like it was made by someone other than my partner? Is there a rule about swapping recycled comments?

Even if there was a rule, you can't prove a thing! Nothing I tell you!!!!

I'd join this swap if I hadn't read all the previous comments...afraid, very afraid.

Can you make this a Dutch-only swap? I'd join this swap if it was.

A Dutch Beaver-only swap would be okay too, but I think the number of swap-partners should be reduced, because the beaver is a protected specie in the Netherlands and I'm not sure if all beavers have access to a computer yet. I could send them an e-mail to ask.

Personally, I could swear in my family history that we must be allergic to beaver cheese, I mean ewwwww. Seriously???? Wow, I just can't even go there. Besides, Draco has me scared of being assed by artners. I mean... "Whoa there Nellie... back away slowly"! Now for unicorns, I can agree that I would join this swap if there were unicorns involved, but fighting? NO WAY! Can we please include a Fat Cat who is completely spoiled swap in this process? My cat Chloe is Morbidly Obese, orange with tiger strips and white puffs of fur. She thinks she owns the house and that I live to serve her. Can I swap her too? Because i will TOTALLY join this swap then! Lastly, for Kathy821, I am afraid too but will attempt to be brave at least once in my life by joining this swap if my ideas are supported by those in the know. As for recycled comments? I am not sure if plagurism is involved but again if it can't be proven... then go for it. I give permission to do so and I am not even the organizer. The organizer is absent and unattentive anyway. :) Even Type 1 swaps should be moderated and line item vetoed once in a while. Right? Hey, does anyone know if unicorns fart rainbows? Curious minds want to know.

Marco?

I'd join this swap if I can be assured I'll get the right color unicorn, but I do have to fix my mailbox. Darned thing is balanced on top of the thing it sits on and sometimes falls off if the mailman gets too boisterous. Also, is there a limit on cats? I have 7 and all but the latest little stray are fixed. Does that give me brownie points? Oh, and I have to watch my sugar, so I need to be given sugar-free brownie points. Oh, yeah, and POLO!

Additionally, I'd join this swap if there just weren't so many buttons to push. I mean, yeah, I pressed the button the first time, so why do I have to confirm? Do you mean there are people out there who press buttons randomly without meaning to? What about those of us who are so ADD that we get right in the middle of signing up and...oh look! A kitty

Draco, love the platypus photo, Thanks for sharing.

I would join this swap if there were more platypus photos.

I'd join this swap if it were hosted by a bear chested, blue eyed, perfectly tanned, well oiled, mildly muscular and svelt baratone with dimples and a smile that could launch you into a heat-filled frenzy!

I would join this swap if I could come up with a witty response, it seems all the good ones are taken. Isn't that the story of life? The good ones are always taken! snpyrunner, I would definitely join the swap if it hosted by a bear chested, blue eyed, perfectly tanned, well oiled, mildly muscular and svelt baratone with dimples and a smile that could launch you into a heat-filled frenzy, although, I am sure he would be taken too! I most definitely cannot afford the postage for this swap, the postal rates are insane, more insane than the crazy folks in my house and I spent all of my money on a magical fairy!!! Now, I have to get off the computer and take my unicorn and fairy out for a walk.

I'd join this swap if all this wasn't so pointless to type out! I mean, come on an electronic swap? What has this world come to:)

I'd join this swap if it were hosted by a bear chested, blue eyed, perfectly tanned, well oiled, mildly muscular and svelt baratone with dimples and a smile that could launch you into a heat-filled frenzy!

yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes.....can someone tell me where to sign up for THAT swap???? I would DEFINITELY be in for that one!!! I would also definitely need that host to come over and personally help me...I'm a hands on kinda girl!!!! shew.....and is his name MARCO??????? THAT would be AWESOME!!!!!

I'd join this swap if I wasn't expected to get it mailed out so soon, I live in Canada, it's still snowing! How on earth do you expect me to get to the post office in the snow, it's just so unreasonable! I'd also join this swap if you hadn't discriminated against cats initially. My cats are still very upset, do you have any idea how hard it is to deal with emotionally distraught cats! They may need therapy now! Not to mention the mutiny of the barn cats you have caused!

I found a pic of the host I am seeking.....can someone tell me how to get it in here??? I'd really like to share!!!! lol

I'd join this swap if there was a like button for each comment.

@cubsfanjennie If the picture is on a website, copy the url and then type. ! [] (paste url here) Do that code without spaces

I'd join this swap if I didn't have to scroll all the way down to the bottom just to comment. AND that doesn't even count the fact that there are all these unicorn pictures in the way. Hurumph.

How do you all know I'm not a beefy bare-chested blue eyed hunk? That profile picture is my MOTHER. God bless her.

I would join but I am stressed out from TAX day. No sarcasm involved with that comment.

Is this our host?????

UGH....NEVER MIND.....not working!!!

![]

AAAAAND....NOPE!!! I'd do this swap if I could actually figure out how to get a pic in my comment!!!

aaaaaarrrrrrrrrgggggggggggg

I enjoy reading the comments although the cats think I need to work on my sarcasm. WTF they are cats what do they know about sarcasm??? I'll show them sarcasm wait until breakfast time yup! On second thought they do have me out numbered lots of claws and teeth ya know.

Polo!

Now I have to join this swap, my cat master told me too. He is interested now there are so many other cats involved (you know what they say about curiosity). Fat cats, striped cats, zombie cats, emotionally distraught cats, unicorn riding cats, sarcastic cats, cats named Marco. Of course he is too aloof to join himself but will let me know if he is displeased.

Heeere's your bear chested host! Now if you wanted BARE chested, now that's something entirely different altogether....LOL

Marco!

I'd join this swap if I was guarenteed to a) learn how to spell guarentee and b) meet the mysterious stallion that is Marco.

I'd join this swap but I fell asleep reading all the 83 comments ahead of me and when I woke up saliva had dripped out of my mouth, got on my keyboard and now my laptop has a virus.... The white saliva mark is attacking unicorns, beavers and a cat that seriously needs a diet...so much animal poop has made my screen blurry....oh wait its not poop...I just forgot to put on my glasses....now I forgot if this is a swap or my personal ad...I like long walks on the beach, and Pina Coladas.. I think I need a nap.

I'd join this swap if there was a picture of Eyebrow dog. Or even if there was an eyebrow cat. But there's no

I would also kid to add I would join this swap if the beaver was shown more respect. It is after all the majestic, dignified national animal of Canada!

Like, not kid, autocorrect strikes again

Yeah!!!! I finally did it! There's your eve brow dog!!!!!!

And our host?

I'd join this swap if I hadn't been working 12 hour shifts getting all of the paperwork ready for court for all of these kids that have been getting arrested constantly then I was abducted by aliens and was returned to the North Pole instead of Florida where I heard that swim lessons were actually cancelled today because it was too cold!! Now I'm being held captive in Santa's workshop making toys on more 12 hour shifts. Luckily I got ahold of this phone and tried to text my cat to come rescue me but he's out on the town with his girlfriend since I'm not home to check on him.

MARCO......

POLO!

I would join this swap but you know who told me not to because that one girl was going to

I just dont think my comments are heart worthy. What if my comments are not good enough? What if Magenna is right and all the good comments are taken, Wait even her comment about all the good comments being taken is me recycling her comment. SEE!!!?????

My husband just informed me that I really need to work on my Sarcasm. I explained to him that I was saving it up for this swap so I didnt have any to spare to use on him. I think he is either disappointed or relieved.

Lol @ Kiki 5856372454490670 and bohemian princess. My cat let me know that I offended her when I refers to her size I a public forum and she peed on my new shoes and threw up on my lab coat. Good thing it was old, however the shoes were not. GRRRR CLOE WTH??? I mean seriously? You owe me 50 bucks sister. You better get a job you mangy ingrate! Okay , my orange little Princess may become homeless after this. Who wants a fat cat? I will throw in a bag of food, her bowls, claw post, bed which she refuses to use because my pillow apparently is more comfortable as well as her favorite video. Going once! Going twice? Come on people help me out here. I am gonna need therapy after I clean a few things. Stupid, spoiled cat!

Bare chested what? Whoooaaa. Now I may totally join this swap!

Nope, I just changed my mind. I can't edit my comments. Stupid auto correct.

OMG, Melannf75, you are so right. I had heard of this but until this very moment I just suspected. My emails are pretty Boring though. The aliens might attack our planet just to have something to do to alleviate the boredom.

@ cubsfanjennie. Does that picture come on Christmas morning with a bow? Just inquiring. Not for myself of course. I am married. But, I do have friends that would love me forever if I sent that their way.

@ gabbyloco... totally there with you! If the profile is not filled out so I can at least make an effort, then the individual gets whatever I grab. Take it or so it out on your next swap. Makes no difference to me.

I am thinking to myself. .. "Melissa, people may just Join this swap in order to silence you". I mean, hey anything is possible. If that happens however, I had at least better get a heart for this"!

That was supposed to read, "take it or send it out on your next swap". Grrrr auto correct strikes again.

I'd join this swap if it weren't for the platypus video and some super large images of bears. I also would have liked to see a hedgehog or two or perhaps a cat nursing some ducklings, a giraffe giving birth or little boy ranting at his mom about chocolate chip cookies, "Linda, Linda, Linda.. Listen"

i'd join this swap, cut my cat won't let me hang out with walmart people

Id join this swap if I knew what to do and if I could post pretty pictures of kittens onto the page.

I would also join this swap if I had the time of day to actually go through and READ all of these comments that go along with all of these pictures because all of these people have all of the time to write all of the messages on all of the websites all over the world.

I would join this swap if I could just catch my breath and stop laughin long enough to sign up. I am just gasping from all this sarcasm. Is sarcasm taught or are some people born with it I wonder?

I would join this this swap if it hadn't degenerated to "the people of Walmart"! Oh my poor eyes, the image forever stuck in my head!

I'd totally join, even force myself to scroll through all the big pictures, risk my partners to being able to find my comments, or not appreciating them, if only our host were beer-chested.

I would join this swap but I'm quite jealous of the bear chested and bare chested pictures of our host. (Lol btw)

I would join this swap but I can't get my printer to work and my mom's is taking too long to install. sigh Another great swap I'll miss out on.

Just for you @PrincessChick and because my cat made me do it... ![](imgur.com/laswlob.jpg

darn missing editing button...

Obviously I can't join this swap because I can't even work a computer.... ![]Imgur

I'd join this swap if the deadline wasn't so far away. I hate waiting to know if I made it in, and who m partners are.

I'd join this swap if I didn't have to scroll down 70 pages to read these insane comments! yup 70 whole pages is a lot of reading for us old people. The cats gave up reading after pg 22!

I would join this swap if there were more pics of the "host"! Hubba hubba!

I'd join this swap if I could regift it to my partner in the next round.

I would join this swap if only I could be bothered to read all the comments.

I wound join this swap , but not sure if my internet can send that far.

I'd join this swap if somebody had not posted my picture from my most recent trip to Walmart. I mean, who has time to check for back fat? Plus, I think I look pretty good in that shot!

Oh, and PS - that was me at the BANK before my trip to WALMART! Get it straight folks!

@kgeslab I would totally be your BFF if I ran into you at Walmart ...just saying...

I would join but there is so much reading between now and the closing date.

I'd join this swap IF I didn't have to find and read TEN other people's comments; IF there weren't so many silly unicorn pictures on here (kudos to whoever the one of that guy! lol); ; IF my cats and dogs could join in - all 6 of them yes!, after all Mr Fluffy Bumberkins needs all the friends he can get; IF there weren't so many random comments that have nothing whatsoever to do with this swap; and IF I had the time to spend finding all ten partners' comments on here. I mean, just finding my ten partners' comments on here out of 90 participants? That is going to take ages.

AND IF there were a "sent my items" thingy to click. How's everybody going to know I did my bit?

I'd join this swap if I didn't have to read through all the comments to find my partners comment.

I'd join this swap, but the description doesn't make it clear if home-made sarcasm is allowed. Yes, I have plenty of store-bought sarcasm... but the home-made sarcasm is so much more wonderful! But I understand that not everyone appreciates the homemade.

I'd join this swap if there was chocolate and wine involved, i need the wine to get past the unicorns, and the chocolate to make me feel all fuzy and warm inside!!!!

RIFTVEGAN, I too prefer homemade sarcasm. Lets do a private swap.

10 more days before this swap closes. How much worse or silly or sarcastic can you all get?

I'd join this swap if I had more pics of the (hubba hubba) host....maybe I can find one on the internet!!!

There ya go @StasiaK

I'd join this swap, if I was guaranteed the host (pic) would be visiting my house. :-)

i'd join this swap, but i was flaked on the last one and have nothing to pass along to my next partners.

also, i'm too busy swimming

with these guys

!!!!MISTER FLUFFY BUMBERKINS AND I WILL BE SWIMMING IF ANYONE IS LOOKING FOR US!!!!

I'd join this swap if Chuck Norris really could cure every disease known to mankind with his tears!

I'd join this swap if I didn't have to scroll past the nekky cowboys to write this pot in such a small text on the iPad.

I'd join this swap if there was a naked cat so Mr fluffy Bumperkins could go swimming too.

I'd join only if Mister Fluffy Bumberkins accepted voles instead of mice! (Geeze some cats are just SO picky!)

I would join this swap if it was by snap mail and not international!!

I would join this swap if I was not so sick! I don't really want to send stuff to 10 people and get them sick. I hate it when people send me stuff and I get sick from it!

ELMAC CHUCK can cure all diseases with his tears. We all know that. Too bad he never cries.

Hey @KraftyKaren ...Here ya go....I hope Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins likes him....

I'd join this swap if there weren't so many comments before mine.

i would do this swap if i had a partner

i would do this swap if i had a partner

I'd join this swap if I hadn't decided to prioritize housework over hobbies.

I'd join this swap if it didn't take up so much space. I mean really look at ALL these comments! Come on people, get lives. Seriously.

I'd join this swap if the text was more colorful. I mean seriously all black text is boring! Well, yea we get a hint of blue here and there and some pictures but still.

Mister Fluffy Bumberkins would like to politely enquire "WHAT HAPPENED TO THAT POOR CAT?!?"

(Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins tends to speak in all caps, as he's typically feline pretty loud. See what I did there? Feeeeeline loud? Feeling loud? Yeah).

ps. Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins would like to let all concerned swappers know that he will indeed accept voles, at a ratio of 3:1. So, three voles would be the equivalent of one mouse.

I'd join the swap if I could hit the "join" link on my iPad with my finger ... the page is so tiny due to the wide images that the link is like 2 pixels tall!

WHERE IS THAT CATS POOR WHISKERS?!?

Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins would like everyone to know that he is now accepting sweater donations for follically-challenged cats. Please know that these donations are IN ADDITION TO the swap that you will already be sending to him, and that your donation is NOT optional.

I would join this swap if it didnt keep growing in length it takes a long time to scroll through everything

It's good to know that Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins also accepts Voles! What is the going rate for gophers and obnoxious small song birds?

Jack wants to know if Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins will trade voles for shrews? He'll even throw in one of my brothers annoying yard chickens.Hes working on a sweater for the naked cat although he has to learn to knit 1st.

Wow, what an anarchy this thread has turned into!!! First unicorns, then beaver, then all other random creatures... And- where is a fox??!!

I would join this swap if fox gets represented!

I would join the swap if I hadn't already joined.

I would join this swap if I was not allergic to all these animals. The stuff I get will be covered in Beaver fur I am sure and I would just have to throw it out...... And that hairless cat - that thing just scares me!

I would join this swap , only if I don't have anything else to do.

I would join this swap if the deadline to send wasn't so tight.

I would join this swap if I could sent a letter with unicorn mail :)

Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins would like to note the following rodent exchange rates:

One vole = 0.33 of a mouse One shrew = 0.11176 of a mouse One tamed shrew = 0.1264 of a mouse One annoying yard chicken (with packet of dipping sauce) = 0.5 of a mouse One fox = 1 mouse

...and now we return to our regularly scheduled programming.

I'd join this swap if unicorns were real and I could get a live one!

Great photo of the sunflower cat? Is that what it is?

id join this swap if there wasnt a gazillion comments to read and awkward photos taking up the whole screen.

I'd join this swap if A..I had time to read all these comments. B. If I liked unicorns, beavers and hairless Chihuahuas and C. "I WANT MY CHINA PIG!"

Jack and Arby say they will take Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins offer they are up for a private swap of 10 mice. They just trying to figure out how to package and mail 20 annoying yard chicken and they'll throw in all the roosters for free. They come with their own sauce!

i'd join this swap if i'm guarantied my artner will send me that hairless cat. i think they are so neat.

whose idea was it to give that cat skittles?

i'm dropping out because SOME people have nothing better to do but tie-dye a poor kitty

i would join this swap only if my dog can join? here's him on a good day...

I'd join this swap if you could un-see some things.....eww

That's a nice lookin' dog.

I would join this swap if my dog was not so terrified of that last picture of a dog....he is afraid I am going to turn him into that with all my craftiness!

I'd join this swap if all the comments were written in dialect(sews ah kin tell whos who),'cause Ah don't want ta associate with Yankees(being frum tha grate state uf Texas an' all)Down hear in tha grate state uf Texas we don't abide with no gol durned unni- corns 'er fairees. Ah am parcel to southerners.

I'd join this swap if I knew how to use a keyboard...

How do I rate if I get a comment that looks like it was made by someone other than my partner? Is there a rule about swapping recycled comments?

i would join this swap, but my cat is playing with the mouse

Oh man, I love that last one.

I'd join this swap if I could find aplace to put my comment that don't take forever to scroll to bottom of all these comments...I do have a life outside of swap-bot ya know.

I'd join this swap if I was into posting photos of beavers, rainbow unicorns, pussy cats, hot guys and bears, but sadly I am not. Of course, I have no idea HOW to post a photo, so that may actually be my biggest hindrance....

I'd join this swap if it wasn't international. I don't know how to send an international email. :p

I'd join this swap if they host it again I'm too worn out from reading the comments to stay in this one. Someone should count them when its over. Heck not me! You thinkIi wanna try to count 500 comments about cats unicorns beaver cheese and strange looking dogs... nope reading them is fun tho ; )

Marco.

I would join this if @draco s dog didn't scare the hell out of me. Thanks for the nightmares by the way.

Polo

I'd join this swap if I actually believed @lena1489 has a life outside swap-bot. But since I'm not buying it, I think I'll steer clear of this swap.

I'd join this swap if it included bubble wrap, flavor glue, and oompa loompa hide and seek.

I would totally join this swap but I simply don't have the time. I mean, geez I have grandkids to hug, dogs to pet and a fat cat to clean up after. She found my other pair of new shoes. GRRrRrr Chloe, you mangy cow! I am gonna skin you alive! What did I do to piss you off? Okay, see? I am way to busy to sit here and play around on swap bot! I am a big deal people! I am in fact a legend in my own mind. Also, I need to watch my TIVO to get rid of my recently recorded Deadliest Catch episode. Besides, I think I am the only nurse on here and I am feeling alone and overlooked. So, I am afraid I will simply have to decline the offer of our host to join in this swap and go on to other things... Like writing my blog and thinking of ways to bring about world peace and making a unicorn habitat. Besides, I need to go clean my closet and put down mentholated cream all over the closet carpet to keep my fluffy, orange princess away from my purses. See? I am really just too busy to participate properly, and besides I probably will not be scored well by my artners as Draco calls them and receive the hearts I so clearly deserve for taking the time to write all of this down for the entire world to see.

MARCO!!!

Besides, I still haven't been able to post a picture. For this reason alone as well as my previously mentioned disgust for not being able to edit my comments, I again decline the offer to join this swap.

OMG! Who took my picture at Walmart? That is so rude! You should have at least warned me before posting it. I mean duh! I would have turned around so you could see my lift bra in action or bent forward so you could totally see my thong! I mean people it was purple with blue polka dots. I picked those out special.... I was on a date.

I think I must have ADD. Does anyone agree with me? Or does anyone suspect that my multiple personalities are showing themselves again? I mean... I haven't heard from Sybil lately. I think she is on vacation and she didn't notify me beforehand. How rude!

Polo! That was my other personality Sophia who answered me from earlier. See? I can play Marco Polo all by ourselves! ROTFLMBO

I think my fat cat Chloe has a crush on Mr. Fluffy.

Oh hey all, Molly B's Polka Party is on. I gotta go, laterz.

I'D JOIN THIS SWAP IF the swap were a snail mail swap. I just like to stand in line and pay me some snail mail. NOT!!!! ;-) ;-)

I'd join this swap if comments were not about unicorns, beavers, strange dogs or kawaii thingies.

I'd join this swap if the swap were about painting big eyed girls/dolls. I love to paint big eyed girls/dolls;-D

I'd join this swap if I didn’t have to go through all these comments to search my ten partners to be able to rate them!

@NurseTank can join now because I am also a nurse. I will join this swap if 3 other nurses join so we can play pin the syringe on the donkey (that would be an anesthetist as they are all asses).

I would join this swap if I was not a hoarder....I mean I get all this cool stuff and I don't want to part with anything so then I have a hard time sending stuff......I love stuff

I would join this swap but it would would break the hearts of all the other swappers who are hosting swaps that I couldn't join because I only have time to join 1 swap at the moment.

I would also join this swap if the host had blue hair. Because everyone knows blue haired people are the "it" crowd to be in.

I would join this swap but the picture of the unicorn man has traumatized me beyond repair. According to my therapist it's a lost cause. Or maybe I'm a lost cause. I can't be sure on that because when I ask all I get is the question of - " And what do you think that means? " thrown back at me. Like if I had all the answers I'd be seeing her!!!

I'd join this swap if it had more flakers in it.

My email inbox is nearly full and it can't really take 10 more messages. If half of the people in the swap were flakers I'd get an average of 5 messages only. That would be better.

Thanks!

I would join this swap, but ZOMBIES ate my brains.. so I do only electronicz now... wait, this is Electronic... did I say zombies ate my BRAINZ... BRaiNZ... BRAinz... I WANT YOUR BRAaaaaaiNS! How Do you put stampz on e-mail.. e-brain... e-unicornz? Do unicornz have BRAINs?

Well, I would have eventually joined this swap, but I got fired.. My boss caught me reading the commentz... and LOLing and... you know how it's ends. My phone battery died (true story), I peed my skirt, my eyes are red… and I'm standing and trying to tell her, that this job is all I have… and how I'm perfect for this job! You know, because I don't have BRAINZ and the decaying stuff... and she won't listen (she's reading the comments and LOLing)... And then she says - I can have my job back if I bring her the beaver stickers. So I took some from my niece... and now she (the boss-still-reading-the-comments) says beaver and Bieber are not the same. And I really CAN'T see the difference... they all have brainz, don't they?! What I gonna do?!! I'm DOOMed and you want me to join some complicated-electronic-10partner-sarcastic-withHearts swap...

I'd join this swap if Mr. Fluffy Bumberkins was not soooo picky about the rodent exchange rates. Tater Tumkins is confused as to what to he would get for 1 vole, half a shrew (He says its the "good half". Whatever that means.) He is also curious about the going rate for a Chihuahua, but is worried about shipping costs to Abu Dhabi.

bah humbug

I'd join this swap if it involved farting rainbows and fairy dust...

I'd join this swap if there's MacDonald breakfast for me to eat everyday!!!!!

I would join this swap, but I am over-involved in swaps at the moment. Just too many irons in the fire or should I say stickers; glitter and scrapbook paper in the way? I can not even find my lap top in all of this mess. By the way, this is not my actual craft room. I was too embarrassed to post mine. Mine is worse!!! LOL.

I'd join this swap if I weren't new

I'd join this swap if it required a stupid atc measured exactly to the tenth of an inch, 50 non-loose stickers that aren't reward based and bigger than a fingernail, 2 pages on wide rulded paper handwritten, a non handmade card, a partridge in a pear tree, an envelope stuffed with lime green things, tea bags that are not black tea or green tea, anthrax, a postcard with a moose getting drunk on it, and a box inside of a box, inside of a box, inside of a box. Yeah, It'd join it if it were that kind of swap with those reasonable requirements.

I would join this swap if only I knew how DRACO found a picture of my dog sitting on a mailbox that is not mine? Hmmmm?

Did somebody ask for an insect?

borrowed from http://www.sickchirpse.com/weird-gross-insects-2/

I'd join this swap,but, Ah have been insulted by no one .

I'd join this swap but I'm probably too sick and twisted to be part of something this much fun! I thought I was twisted. This whole comments chain is wonderfully twisted! Thanks so very much, everyone, for making me smile every day!

@KatShakKreations I have that exact same table at my house!

Id join ...but ive spent too much time reading this comment section...I thought id just have to read ten peoples comments...but u know I read the Whole thing...like most of us have...lol

I'd joint this swap if my dog could join. He never gets to join any fun swaps, he's pretty good at ''nose art''

Dear @AZmom875 So sorry it has taken me so long to respond to your request for a homemade sarcasm private swap. I have been clearing out my swaps and I am now down to 315 active swaps... so I'm pretty sure I can send you some sticker slapped sarcasm, now, if you'd like. Thanks!

i'd join this swap... but i'm busy scrolling to read others people comment.. n i'm enjoy it... hihihi

Draco that dog is just wrong is so many ways!

I'd joined this swap out of a case of better judgement...but after seeing how many people are involved, a social phobic like myself is just finding 110 participants too much to handle. As such, I'm considering dropping this swap from my list.

Additionally, 10 partners? That's just going to rip me apart in trying to rate everyone. Communicating with that many people on the same day? hoo-boy. Not sure I can handle it.

I'd join this swap if kgeslab would not have allowed sarcasm that would make me laugh so hard i might pee. I'm old and already cough and pee - now i will laugh and pee..... damn bladder!

I just discovered that I literally can't join this swap because I can't tell the difference between a hairless cat and a hairless Chihuahua.

Polo!

I'd join this swap, but not sure there will be enough time to find all 10 of my partners comments with 110+ people in the swap.

I'd join this swap but I had to put my fat cat on a diet and he says if he can't have all the food he wants then I can't join all the swaps I want. : ( Dang cat's just plain mean when he's hungry.

I'd also join this swap if I wasn't so worried about Marco and Polo out there lost and calling for each other. So sad. I just know there's another great love story in the making there somewhere. sniff sniff

I would join this swap if it was more clear when Mr. FluffyBumberkins and I are expected to leave hearts. I mean, we don't want to just totally overdo the heart thing, I mean, there are some comments that might deserve hearts, but if we give a heart to someone for the wrong reasons, then aren't we setting the heart bar too low, and then everyone will expect a heart? But if we don't leave a heart for one of those people who keep track of their "heart ratios", and we screw up their perfect heart record because we didn't think that their sarcastic comment was heart-worthy and then they start sending us those "leave me a heart OR ELSE" messages? Mr. FluffyBumberkins and I refuse to bow to heart pressure, and would like to know what the specific heart criteria is (number of words? Level of sarcasm detected? Specific words used?)

THERE ARE ONLY SO MANY HEARTS AVAILABLE TO GIIIIVE!!!!111

ps. We would like to offer an automatic heart to anyone who tattoos a tribute to Mr. FluffyBumberkins onto their person, as shown:

That's an awesome tattoo.. LOL

and this ^ is what photoshop was made for..

I would join this swap if I didn't have to do a tribute to Mr. FluffyBumberkins onto my person

((In all seriousness I would love if when rating people would also bother to leave some kind of a comment. I'm not bothered of getting "just a 5", a heart is just a plus but getting "just a 5" and no comment at all makes it feel like I've been a crappy partner or that you just can't be bothered to rate properly. Not just with this swap but in general. Just that I've been rated by 3 partners (for this) so far and only one rated "properly", it's disheartening.))

ALTHOUGH MISTER FLUFFY BUMBERKINS DID NOT RECEIVE PARAXPARAXNOIA AS A SWAP PARTNER, MISTER FLUFFY BUMBERKINDS WOULD LIKE TO RECOGNIZE PARAXPARAXNOIA WITH AN HONOURARY HEART AND VOLE AND AS A COMMENT/PRAISEWORTHY SWAP PARTNER. MISTER FLUFFY BUMBERKINS' HUMAN HAS SWAPPED WITH PARAXPARAXNOIA IN THE PAST AND THINKS THAT THEY DESERVE MUCH LOVE.

(Sorry, I think that Mr. FluffyBumberkins is a little excited this morning, what with all of the hearts, mice, voles and comments which lay before him. However, his comments are accurate)

i'D JOIN THIS SWAP IF i DIDN'T HAVE TO RATE A MILLION PARTNERS. ESPECIALLY IF THEY DIDN'T HAVE NAMES STARTING WITH USER# BLAH, BLAH, BLAH

Oh wait I already did join. I wish the host would have set me up with better partners, like ones named Kitty Bummer and Unicorn Sparkles.....

I'd Join this swap but.................. I thought we were supposed to email the reason why we couldnt comply. The thought of emailing 10 people and telling them about my awful hemmoroid surgery and what a pain in the butt that has been has just about had me hurting before I even had the surgery. Luckily I was informed I only needed to post here and that saved by butt--literally. However it still meant I needed to share such a private thing with many so I still wouldnt have joined this swap

I'd join this swap if .... oh,okay, I'm rating my partners,but seriously - why are those I "rate" different than the "partners" that show up in a separate window... oh well - I'm rating those that I can rate and the rest of you, well, I love all of your comments. <3

Much thank you Mr. FluffyBumberkins! I have taken over my humans computer system and would like to say that the said human seems much pleased with all this honorary shenanigans! More food and love for me it seems so I bid you farewell, we must meet in a future swap! //Mr. Pumpernickle XIV, PhD.

(For all the other humans here, I did really enjoy this swap, hopefully there'll be more!)

i wish i could still drop out of this swap do to people having a problem with that dog i posted. it's not MY fault that is a REAL bread of dog (chinese crested, i think)

and i've dressed worse at walmart

I would totally join this swap if it is offered again. It was so much fun, I laughed so much, and I will definitely miss checking the swap page to see the new funny comments/ pics/ all that! Thank you all!

I've been messaging the cord kgeslab because my partners to rate are not the same ones I have sent to me as my partners....I have the list of "who you send too" then when I click on the link rate your partners they are completely different people. I have messaged about this a couple days ago and no response still. So I haven't been able to rate anyone. Anyone have any suggestions?

@Ididley24 That's how this site works- the ones you send to and the ones you receive from are different persons. It doesn't matter who you send to- they will just find your comments on their own and will rate you. Your task is to find who are supposed to send you (click on "Rate your partners and coordinator",) find/ read the comments they wrote, and rate them.

OMG @bragal You slay me... LOL. ROFLMBO!!!!!!! Yes they are!

sorry i was slow in responding. i broke my arm and have been out of commission and can't easily type with my left hand only.

OMG...if I buy a giant tent will all of you people move into it with me and form a really weirda$$ commune full of people dedicated to beaver/unicorn conservation??? I am literally dying at these comments.

I Will move into Chelle353's tent if I can bring my platypus named Cleatus.

Just as I said, there is always someone who fails to rate me! I got nine ratings for this swap! Who didn't rate StarMouse?!?

Breaking News! I have received my 10th rating for this swap! Thanks, all for rating! ;-)

Oh my goodness, and TWO whole days after the close of the swap!! How dare someone make you wait so long for your rating!!!

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